Study Shows That The Worst United States Presidents Have All Been Clean Shaven

It has been over a hundred years since a man with permanent facial hair has held the Oval Office. Over an entire decade of clean shaven men claiming to know what's best for the people. I think that it's about time we end this trend and put another hairy-chinned man on Capitol Hill.

One thing to consider is that facial hair has long symbolized wisdom, perseverance, and courageousness. Many ancient civilizations wore beards to portray dignity or honor, and some even used the cutting of beards as an act of punishment. Furthermore, plenty of cultures throughout history have worshiped Gods that were portrayed as muscly, fully-maned individuals. Of course, just because Gods have beards doesn't necessarily mean that men with beards are inherently somewhat Godly.

However, on a very basic level, seeing a man with a well-crafted beard means a few undeniable things. For starters, it definitely shows his patience and ability to commit. The early days of a beard are full of awkwardness that would make a weaker man back out from the initial plan, rather than keep his eyes on the intended mission. It takes a certain amount of loving care and attentiveness to achieve facial greatness.

So it should go without saying, that all of these qualities easily translate into leadership. Regardless of your political beliefs, if you take a moment right now to decide who you believe is the worst president in this nation's history, I can nearly guarantee that whoever you chose did not have facial hair.

If we consider the Mount Rushmore monument, designed by Gutzon Borglum, we can note that it was created to show the faces of presidents who represent America's birth, growth, development, and preservation. Perhaps it is fitting then, that two of the four men carved into the mountainside were two of the few that sported facial hair while in office. Lincoln and Roosevelt, the two that were chosen to represent development and preservation, were also known for their honesty and bravery, respectively.

But for whatever reason, this country keeps throwing clean-shaven candidates to the ballots, and the American people are forced to choose between the lesser of two evils. The only type of shaving that should be done in D.C., is the shaving of all the beardless men who lack these characteristics that beards represent. Instead of having razors in fists, let's raise our fists and demand to bring the beard back to this country. Let's strive for a Lubrication of the Nation.